The Universe, God, & Trading

Why is it that we can trade an amazing system but then all of a sudden… BOOM! We blow out an account??

This nasty fear usually creeps up on traders in a way that we can’t mask. We don’t see it coming but being an unprofitable trader can literally destroy our lives.

In this article, I will relay some things that happened to me (Ryan). Afterwards, we will share ideas that may help you overcome the absolute worst thing that a trader can go through…


Traders are phenomenal about working ourselves into a frenzy of worry, doubt, distrust, hatred, and all those aweful feelings that go along with trading. Who can relate?

Many people jump off wall street buildings and die over this profession. If you get down to it… “why are traders so stressed?” Welp we always search for that never-ending, unreachable goal.

That “Magic” System

That No-Loss Strategy

We often think, “I am so close I can taste it!”

We always put that profit potential way out in the future… “SOMEDAY” I’ll do it. Here is a short sotry…

It was a tough battle, back in the day, but then I finally managed to scrape out a profit. Then another then another and started making an income. I did that for a while and it started building into more wealth. then I hit a brick wall.

I hit it so hard that I could never overcome it. everything I tried didn’t work. I tried meditation and clearing my mind. I went to the doctor for antidepressants. I drank alcohol. I used cannabis. I prayed. I started promising god, ” if you will, i will…”

Any and all of these emotions took over and i had to figure out a way to get out of this obnoxious zone.

somehow I did ‘figure it out’, so I thought, and everything was fine again. In a matter of a week, I managed to turn my thinking around and start thinking of the possibilities, the “what ifs” and started making money again. at that point, a nice man came along named Rob Booker who came to see me in knoxville, Tennessee.

As we sat there at aBBQ joint, on the patio, I told him how I was doing yada yada. (There are like 5 episodes on the traders podcast. you can go back and listen if thats your thing .

I was on top of the world! I kept getting better and better and better…. Nothing could stop me! I knew a skill…

My family then decided to do what we always wanted to do and move to sunny Sothern California and live the dream!

We aren’t here (In Cali) for even 2 weeks when the pressure started to build. I didn’t know what was going on. I started to get angry at everything. I was mad because it was too hot. I was mad becasue it was too cold. Mad because our household expenses went up by 50%, Mad becasue of this traffic.

Mad, Mad, Mad

…and i stayed mad.

…and i got angrier. the more evil emotions I felt, the more verbally abusive I got. I would snap at my kid, you, myself, god, the pope, trump, my wife, or anyone else that would listen.

As the laws of the universe predict, I got exactly what I was focussed on and eventually hit a brick wall; The income started to dry up. This led to more negative thoughts and more negative thoughts.

I went vegan and thought, ” Ok Everything will be ok now.” My life long migraine headaches stopped immediately (this is why I don’t eat meat.)

Life was good for a while but i was still angry at the world and one night, while standing in the kitchen, a slight pain in my left side, below my rib cage appeared. I thought it was a pulled muscle.

Fast forward a year and a half and that pain eventually turned into pain so bad that it spread all over my torso, down my left arm to the point that I caught some type of infection and had to stay on strong antibiotics for 3 weeks. I was sick in bed, unable to trade or do anything in life for days and days and weeks on end.

My life seemed to be over. I thought I had heart problems. I thought I had lung problems. My stomach hurt to the point that I stopped eating.

I started hating life. i hated coming to work. i could barely break even now. My wife began to resent me. My son started to change and pick up my personality traits as an angry person.

I yelled at God every day. ” Please do something!!!” It was really really bad. This was the darkest period in my life.

I puked almost every day – all day. At one point, my wife was siting outside of the shower holding me while i was inside puking while the shower water was washing the chunks and bile down the drain. I was dying.

I lost almost 100 pounds. From a hefty 270 pounds down to 185 at my lowest.

From doctor to doctor to specialists to holistic medicine to acupuncture to MRI’s, Cat scans, endoscopy, colonoscopy, ultrasound, blood work, every test imaginable.

Night sweats were so bad that I had to sleep on a towel, get up in the middle of the night and replace he towel with a dry one, shaking, barely making it to the bathroom.

The doctors found nothing wrong with me and called it chronic gastritis and autoimmune disease. Hint – Doctors call something an autoimmune disease if they don’t know where the issue lies. They had me on 80 Mg of Omeprazole (Very High Dose) and 16 Mg of Zofran (The same medication that Chemo patients use and a high dose), and some antidepressant.

I was losing my mind but thought, ” I have to maintain. I can’t let others see what’s going on.” so I continued to post pictures on Facebook that represented only a few hours of life per week when i could manage to get out of bed.

I had severe thoughts of just ending it and letting my wife and kids have the life insurance policy. i certainly wasn’t helping, wasn’t living, and there was literally nothing that could be done at this point. I was out of options.

I could eat but like 2 days a week and literally survived on Soylant (a meal replacement drink)

Heres the kicker

The symptoms were constant, never-ending. In an instant I decided, ” I have had enough! God, you either take me out of this world or heal me now.” I was desperate. My business was down the drain, my marriage was gone, my trading was crap, my son looked at me differently and one of the only things that kept me going was one thought, ” I can’t die. My wife and kids will hate me for giving up.”

We managed to take a trip for our 10 year anniversary and I totally ruined that as well. I was still angry, debilitated, nearly dead and took it out on anyone and everyone around me. (Don’t let the happy Facebook posts fool you 😉 As I laid there in the hotel room spewing with anger and watching the sad and disappointed look on my wife’s face, I thought in that instance, “I have to find the answer and I wont stop searching until I do.”

I began quoting Bible verses back to God… James 4:8 “Draw near to God and He will draw near to you” and John 14:14 ” You may ask me for anything in my name, and I will do it. ”

I knew God wasn’t a liar. I told my wife, “Babe, this next week might get really weird but I don’t care.” My intent was to focus all of my energy on one goal… to heal myself or allow God to heal me without medication and only with my mind. I was all in.

In a matter of about 12 days now (Yep that was as recent as 12 days ago, i went from being at deaths door to eating full meals. My pain in my side is diminishing (hasn’t been gone like this in a year and a half). It went from the size of a softball in my stomach (left side under rib cage) to the size of a small marble now.

I haven’t puked in 12 days and this the longest stretch of time I have went without getting sick in over a year and a half!

My marriage is beginning to restore and last night, my wife looked at me like she used to… with that sparkle in her eye. There is laughter in our house again. There is excitement and ambition again.

I now know that the cause of this “disease” was from an unimaginable amount of stress. I also know how to heal it because I am already in the process of it.

A lot of times, when chronic illnesses arrive, people tell us, “It’s all in our mind.” That statement used to piss me off but it’s true. Always has been and always will be… long story short… if you ALLOW your emotions and feelings to take over, they will take over.

People sometimes ask, ” But how can i not allow them to take over?”

That’s a very difficult question to answer but it IS quantifiable because I have been documenting the entire process, all the triggers and everything. what works and what does not. It can even get to the point where you can tell a part of your body to do something and it will. this happened to me last night. Mind over matter is a real thing.

We, as traders, always have everything stacked against us and if we allow negative thoughts to enter our minds, they WILL take over. I am now going to share a video about how a neuroscientist healed his own broken spine. I will share the video beIuse i am doing about the same process now and seeing phenominal results in my body and in my mind.

Once you heal your mind, you heal your body and your trading.

Watch this video and think, ” What if?”

Am I back to normal, 100%? No. I am documenting the process in private medical forum and I will share that with the world on the DAY that every symptom disappears. That may be quite soon.

Not Hocus Pokus.

Not Wishful thinking.

Not even positive thinking.

It’s backed by science.

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